It is a new year, and I should be in bed. There are plenty of blessings surrounding working for an institution of higher learning. We are given an abundance of time off.
I have found myself thinking a thought twice over the past couple of days. The thought goes like this. I have been stuck. I have been stuck for so long that I have become late. I'm reminded of the scene from Big Fish where the story comes back to Spectre for the second time. Edward Bloom is either too early or too late. I feel like I am too late.
The life I am living now is something that should've happened years ago, but I was lost, stuck, and could not find my way out. It wasn't until recently (recently in my own way) that I feel I am growing and moving forward.
There is a beautiful, gorgeous woman in my life. She has an eccentric, but loving family; and my family appears to love her (so much in fact, I feel they like her more than me... I'm fine with that). I have a good job (read previous statement about blessings). I have good friends. I am better off than 90% of the rest of this world. I'm incredibly fortunate to be living the life I have and I continue to have this nagging feeling that I have wasted a good portion of it wallowing in self-imposed misery. I feel like it is only recently that I'm finally getting caught up. I 'reckon it is good that I'm a quick learner.
I hope I take to heart these lessons I've been taught. It makes me feel good to hear a friend compliment the growth they have seen in my over the past 5 years. I don't think I'll share it with them, but they have been an instrument of change in me.
What better time to look behind than at the beginning of something new.
